As We Fall
by Niskala
Summary: As Kanryuu fires the gattling gun, the Oniwabanshu jumped to the front of their leader, what was they thinking as they fall? What are their sacrifices for? featuring Hannya & Aoshi's thoughts (2 chaptered)


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~*~ End of The Line ~*~

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Disclaimer : Rurouni Kenshin with its places, characters and events are not mine, they are Nobuhiro Watsuki's. I claim no right to them. The song I used is titled "End of The Day" from Rurouni Kenshin too, I claim no right to the song either.

Listen to the song "Alone Again" from the OVA Soundtrack, I wrote this while listening to that, so I thought it would really match what I have in mind. I would not suggest you to listen to "End of The Day" since I myself don't quite know how the song sounds since, honestly, I never heard it. Yet I found the lyric to be suitable for this fic of mine.

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Everything is falling apart. 

_  
_

_---If there is some ache before sleep comes_

_---It is the broken love which even now remains in pieces _

  


Everything that had always been my whole world is falling apart. Oniwabanshu is falling apart. I could not see clearly now, only in blurs and unfathomable lines which would sometimes form a familiar figure, but when I started to recognise what it was, the fog came back and everything turned black. I thought of many things during those short seconds as I fall to the ground together with my comrades; Hyottoko, Shikijou, Betshimi, and Aoshi or should I say, Ogashira?

Aoshi and I had always been so close, so close. We were friends, and I cherish him more than I could describe in words. The others loved him too. We, the members of Oniwabanshu, should have been disbanded a long time ago when the Meiji era arrived, and most of the other members had left their posts and took on a normal life. They threw away their weapons and uniforms and went on a life more ordinary, more secure, and…happier.

_---They are not so distant that they be mistaken for the deep night _

_---The memories I do not want to be adorned just with sighs_

A few of us had no ability to do that, however, like me and Hyottoko and Shikijou and Betshimi. We never knew any life more ordinary than the life we lived when we were joined in the Onmitsu, and we could not live in the changed world with its steel guns and roaring machines. All we knew of the world was bloodshed, war, and combats, what else could we do but fight for our lives and gain food and supply in return? We never whined or said anything about this to the others, even though we were sure that we could not survive the new world, and yet Aoshi noticed this and he did not disband the Onmitsu thoroughly. He kept those who could not live on their own, and he took care of them.

_---This floating heart has become scary _

_---It seems like it will cease to see itself _

_---To those days that look as if they were in flames _

_---I say farewell and turn my back_

At that time, there was no place for a group like us to live or endure, no one needed us anymore. The world was in peace, there was no need for spies, no need for assasins. Aoshi knew this also, but he never said anything to us. He could have been elected as a governor somewhere or at least, someone significant to the government. After all, he was a hero as he once stood beside the imperial guards, protecting the court with all his might and he was loyal to them. And he was bid to join an election once, which he turned down with a reason which he would not tell us.

I knew what that reason was; he did not want us to be left to die in a world we did not recognise. He was always quiet and short on words, people who never knew him personally would say he was cold and rigid when it comes to personality, but to us, he was not. He rejected all offers of positions and wealth to still maintain the small group of the formerly strong Oniwabanshu. There were only a few of us left in the world, and I always knew that, we always knew that. We just never gave up on pretending that we were still the members of the magnificent Onmitsu Oniwabanshu who knew everything but nothing.

_---Something is not enough Somewhere I had made a mistake _

_---No matter how much I bluff _

_---I cannot yet see the exit _

_---In the center of a maze I clutch my knees_

We owed so much to Aoshi, and you might not believe this, but yes, we owed so much to him. If it were not for us, he could have been known all over Japan as a hero from the past who helped the world to be a better place. He could have been a wealthy man swimming in his riches. He could have lived a happier life than the life he had to go through with us. I could not say that he was the sunshine or the star of our lives because he was always dark and cold, I admit this. Yet inside he was strong and prevailing; if he wanted something, he would run the full circle of the world to get it and in this case, he wanted the Oniwabanshu to prevail and we did, until the last moment when it finally crumbled to the ground, leaving only a pile of dust from which the strong force which protected Japan came from.

It was not fair that we were not remembered by those people who lived in the new era. They only knew the government calmed the situation down and finally the world was again a safe place to live in. Have they ever heard of us, the Oniwabanshu? Have they ever heard of the mighty Aoshi who protected them from the Bakumatsu side? Have they ever heard of the firey Hyottoko who drank a gallon of oil each day? Have they ever heard of Shikijou the scarred? Have they ever thought that there was someone behind all the peace they now enjoy?

---Outside the window the night passes too much ---For time cannot be returned 

Aoshi was not the sunshine or the star, he was a solid rock which we held on to since the Onmitsu was no longer complete. He kept us strong and determined to survive the odd new world, and to keep the honor which the heroes of the past once bore. He kept us standing when all we wanted to do was fall over and weep, he was our foundation. Now, little Misao comes to the scene; she was the sunshine in our world, she was our star to which we hung our highest dreams and hopes. She was the symbol of what we achieved; peace, joy and innocence which the new world possess.

_---Like a pale dream _

_---The gap between today and tomorrow troubles me_

And for all those that we gave our lives for. For the hope that now, Aoshi can take up a better life without thinking about us and Misao can live on with him in joy. For the future of Aoshi and his happines s which he gave up for us, that we gave up our lives in return. 

Do not misunderstand us, we gave up our lives not with the reason that we gave up on living and fighting. Instead, it was because we could see no hope in fighting the snarling steel weapon with slender piece of steel stick or with fists or with steel chains. We lived knowing that the fighting skills we learned were matchless, we were too caught up in our conviction that we did not realise that the modern world has caught up on us. The gattling gun roared again in my ears and several parts of my body seared in pain as they caught the bullets.

_---I ask for much I do not want to be hurt _

_---Only escaping those words _

_---Now rather than hiding my frailty _

_---Head on I take it all in_

Memoirs of the past cannot live in the future just as a butterfly cannot live in winter. In this new world, the air was cold, the people were all strangers just as we were strangers to them. I had always wanted to shout out to them, "Don't you know me? Can't you recognise the one who made your life peaceful and happy?" I restrained myself from doing that, though, because it would make no difference. They would just turn their heads to another direction and go on their ways.

There was no more place in this world for us to live in anymore; we were not needed anymore, and so we were thrown away just like a broken umbrella after a storm. And so, there were no more reasons for us to keep on living in a world which would not accept us. We will give up our lives knowing that it will be worth awhile for the world to have a leader like Aoshi and a friend like Misao.

As the steel monster vommitted more bullets, we shatter; together with all the memories of the past and Oniwabanshu. We did not shatter to fall, however, we fall only to rise the honor of warriors long gone. It would be much better if we were gone anyway, we could only cause nuisance to the world. And so we let ourselves fall, together with all the lives we ever had. Our sacrifice will not be in vain and Oniwabanshu will never fall; it will live on, as a memory perhaps, yet it will not be gone. I will not rest as I died; I will walk on and I will always remember Aoshi and Misao. I hope this time I could finally see why the new world cannot accept one who was from the former world. That I shall strive to find just as Aoshi had strived to keep us going.

_---The thing not enough _

_---The place where I had erred _

_---They teach a little pain _

_---When the day breaks _

_---I walk on to search for a new self_

Everything was falling apart,

And yet, a new hope of the future for our beloved Ogashira and our sunshine will rise.

Oniwabanshu will always be remembered as honorable and prideful. This is the real power of the Onmitsu.

I can now feel the chilly marble on my back, and I knew I reached my end of line, it is time for me and my life to end. Yet it would not be so for Oniwabanshu or Aoshi or Misao, and I close my eyes and breathed my last, always knowing…that this is not the end…for everyone but us…

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Author's Note : Firstly before I say anything, my reason for writing this is because my muses showed me what Oniwabanshu really is. I got the inspiration to write this while I watched the episode where Aoshi attacked Okina and Misao was so devastated. That time, I hated Aoshi so much for being so…so…evil, I should say, and how could he turned his back against his own gang? Then it came to he that he did not turn his back against his gang, instead, he was actually avenging his gang by killing one member of his gang, and it kind of get a bit twisted after that. I then decided that Oniwabanshu's fate is so twisted that it sounded very interesting, and so, with my muses pushing my back, I wrote this to show that I care about the Oniwabanshu. 

By the way, you need to be really afraid because there's one more chapter coming which will be in aoshi's point of view! Heh…heh…be afraid…be very afraid!! (I kind of caught that phrase from my editor, she signed her e-mails with that phrase)

PS: I apologize for the wrong names since I bought the manga, translated into Indonesian which is my first language, and in it was written Hyotto instead of Hyottoko, Shikaku instead of Shikijou and Betsuni instead of Betshimi. So, again, I apologize for that. I made this fic when I got the inspiration and I admit that I did not do any researching about Oniwabanshu beforehand, hence I don't have extensive knowledge of them. Even, if any of you seem to know what Onmitsu Oniwabanshu could mean, will you please explain it to me? I could not find it either in my jap-ind dictionary or in the Internet. Thanks.

Thank you so much for reading and I am very grateful that you actually trusted my writing skills enough to try and read my piece, but I would be even more grateful if you would give me wome feedbacks which could help me improve. After all, I wrote fics so that people can comment and cricticize it, and I can learn from my mistakes. Thank you.

Please review


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